Tease Me Tuesday and an Update…

It has been a crazy few weeks here in Duncan-land. In the process, I’ve let some of my regular posts go, and I do apologize for that.

One of the things that you may have noticed that’s disappeared is my Wednesday Briefs posts. Fear not, Ghalib has no gone away! You will read the rest of his story, I promise. However, Ghalib, and the rest of my briefs, are moving to Friday, starting August 1st. I have co-founded a new site with author Andrew Q. Gordon that we’re calling Free Fiction Friday. The website is still very basic, but that is part of what is taking up my time, as I am working on putting it together. Look for our first posts on August 1st. We have some great authors already lined up and hope to have a lot more.

I do hope you guys enjoyed the BDSM blog hop a couple of weeks ago. I had a lot of fun, if a stressful fun, putting it together and hope to do it again. I enjoyed being able to talk about a subject so near and dear to me.

Another thing that has been taking up my time is a new story! This one is… well, very different for me, as it… young adult. Yes, young adult. I started out writing for this anthology:

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I’m still not all that great at writing to a theme but I started out with a story that has since been named The Geek and His Artist and which kind of… well, took off.  I sort of just blinked at the 10k limit as I sailed by it, smiled nervously at the 11k mark, fidgeted when the 12k mark walked by and finally conceded defeat at 12,252 words. Geek still isn’t done and has been set aside, instead, for another story that I sat down on Friday night to put some notes in on and ended up… mostly finishing. 6k and a lot of shock later. Blue Eyes gives a glimpse of a homeless gay teen living on the street, trying to fight his fears and get past them to find hope again. This was even more a departure from my usual stuff, but I am very proud of it and hope to see it as part of the anthology. Below, you’ll find a little tease from the story.

I do intend to finish Geek and hope to submit it to Harmony Ink before too long. Then back to my boys on their boat and What About Now.

In the meantime, here’s a small tease from Blue Eyes. Make sure to keep an eye out for the return of Ghalib on August 1st, too! Until then, happy reading!

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Mr. Handsome looked around. “Thanks. I can’t believe how many people are here. It’s a good thing, though. I wish we got more, but we’re still new.” He smiled over at me. “I’m Will,” he said, offering his hand.

This actually kind of shocked me. The do-gooders, for all they wanted to help, weren’t usually willing to touch. I automatically held my hand out. “Andy. Hi.”

Will’s smile brightened even more. “Nice to meet you, Andy. Do you come here often?” He rolled his eyes and dropped his face in his hand. “I did not just say that.”

Despite myself, I started laughing. “Second time here, actually. It’s a nice place. The food is amazing. Do you cook?”

It was Will’s turn to laugh. He shook his head. “Oh no. I’d burn everything. They don’t let me near the food. I’m allowed to fill the drink machines and stuff, but I can’t touch the rest.”

I couldn’t help but smile. “Yeah, I was never good at cooking. Back when…” I didn’t bother finishing the thought. For the most part, I’d gotten good at just not thinking about the ‘before’ part of my life.

“What are you good at?”

I stopped myself from saying something asinine like finding places to sleep or finding ways to keep from going crazy, because I knew that wasn’t what he meant. “Computers. I used to build them.”

“Oh, I wish I was good at computers. I mean, I can use them, but I couldn’t build them.” He grinned.

“So… what are you good at?” I found myself asking. I really needed to end the conversation, eat my food and get out of there. This had been a bad idea.

“Music. Or, well, I used to be. I haven’t had an instrument to play in so long. That’s one of my goals.”

“Goals?” I asked, then cursed myself. Shut up, already!

Will nodded. “Yeah. We have to set these goals. Some of them are kind of big, like finish school or get a GED. Others are smaller, like fill out a college application or, like mine, get an instrument. I want a guitar. I used to be able to play really well.”

I blinked at him, a little lost. Something wasn’t adding up. “Your… school makes you do that?” The GED thing sounded odd, but maybe it was some sort of alternative school?

Will actually laughed. “No, silly! The shelter.”

I stared. “Shelter?” I was so lost and feeling more and more so as I went.

Will nodded, waving a hand around him. “This one. Do… Do you know what this is?”

I shook my head, still feeling lost. “I thought it was just a new soup kitchen.”

Will smiled. “We do run the kitchen, but the rest of the building is a shelter for LGBT youth.”

I felt the blood drain from my face. This was the last place I needed to be. I jumped up, meatloaf, fresh bread and chocolate cake forgotten. “Oh, uh, sorry. Uh, take care.” It came out mashed together as one long word, but I didn’t much care. I bolted.

Designs of Desire by Tempeste O’Riley on sale for only 99¢!

99¢ today only at Dreamspinner Press!

http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/store/product_info.php?products_id=4038

Artist James Bryant has forearm crutches in every color from rainbow for fun to sleek black for business. He even has a pair with more paint splatters than metal. After his family’s rejection and abuse from a man he thought loved him, James only just gets through the day by painting. He lives in constant fear that he’s not worthy of anything, let alone love.

As CEO of his company, Carrington Enterprises, Seth Burns is a take-charge kind of guy, and he is instantly smitten by the artist helping with his newest project. When he witnesses James suffer a panic attack, a protective instinct he never knew he had kicks in. He truly believes nothing is unobtainable—including James—if he’s willing to put in the time and effort.

James is shy and confused by Seth’s interest in him as a person. With Seth’s support, can he work through his fears to finally find the true love he deserves, or will someone finally land the crushing blow he won’t survive?

 

BDSM Blog Hop, Part 5: My submission & Sexy Snippet Sunday

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Welcome back to the last day of the hop! I hope you’ve enjoyed yourselves with all the amazing posts! I have truly been thrilled with all the participation and hope I can convince folks to do this on an annual (at least) basis. There is so much misinformation out there, so much that just doesn’t begin to show the realities of BDSM that I’ve been very happy to be part of the hop and hope I’ve done my small part to dispell some of the mess.

Since it is Sunday, I will still post my Sexy Snippet a little later on. But before I do, I wanted to give a little bit more of a personal post about my submission. I’ve talked about bits and pieces, a few of the kinks that I am into, but now I’d like to delve a little deeper into the submissive’s mindset.

Fiction often portrays a submissive, I grant. But unfortunately, there are a lot out there that make it seem like it’s someone who’s been abused or been through trauma and they just need to be controlled a bit and BDSM will “fix” them. Or that they’re someone who just needs a “good Dom” to show them how to live. Vicktor Alexander talks about this a bit in his post for today. (You can go read that here.)

Submission has nothing to do with any of that. Submission, in my not-so-humble-opinion, is about giving up control over certain things, to another individual. Those certain things are negotiated, agreed-upon specific things and nothing more. What those are will be different for almost every submissive out there. There are contracted submissives who give up almost everything. There are some who only hand over control when it comes to being tied up. There are a million different possibilities out there.

What it isn’t is weakness. I believe that submissives are some of the strongest people out there, not the weakest. We know ourselves, understand ourselves in ways very few people do. We know what we need and we understand what will help us get that. It takes a lot of strength to hand over control of ourselves in any way to another person. Strength and trust.

I trust my Sir. We’ve been married going on 12 years now (together for 13) and in those 12 years, we’ve learned a lot about each other. Communication has always been one of our top priorities (we haven’t always succeeded, but that’s a different story for a different time. ;) ). Because of that, when I found myself seriously interested in doing more than some spanking or tying up, I knew I could go to my hub and say something. That communication has allowed us to explore this.

It also means that when I am feeling off, like I need something more, I can go to him and tell him. I have days were I really need the reassurance that submitting to him can give me and he has yet to let me down in that way. That might mean he simply takes control of everything for a while. It might mean he plans a scene. It might mean something else. After years of communication, thankfully, he doesn’t need to me to be nearly that exact.

Let me be clear there, though, this happens after years of communication. I don’t want any of my readers to think they could (or should) go to a Dom(me) they met yesterday and expect him (or her) to be able to read their minds or anything that silly. Sir and I don’t need to negotiate every tiny aspect of a scene anymore. We’ve been doing this together for long enough that it’s not necessary. He knows what I like, he knows my hard limits, and he can trust that I will use my safeword if I need to. And I can trust he’ll honor that. I’ve only ever needed my safeword a few times (and one of those was in the delivery room with our youngest. THERE’S a story for later. ;) ). But when I needed it, I used it.

My submission is an ongoing, ever-changing thing. But what that means is that we talk about it, all the time. If I feel that I need somthing a little different, I’ll tell him – outside of a scene – and he’ll listen. If he needs or wants to do something we haven’t done before, he tells me, again, outside of a scene. That’s our negotiation.

It works for us, but only because of how we, as a couple, have been for many years.

This has been more of a personal narrative than anything, but I can only, truly, speak to my experiences within the lifestyle. I can only speak to what know to be true. I’ve seen a lot but I am not in that person’s head, so I can’t tell you what they want, how they do things, or what brought them to that point. But I figure that it’s possible that someone out there has been in a similar situation, so maybe my thoughts can help them.

Remember, in the end, if you want to explore this, there’s a world of possibilities out there. If you keep it safe, sane and always have or give consentthen you’ll do fine. Never let anyone tell you what you “have” to do as a submissive. Never let anyone tell you that you’re not a good “sub” if you “don’t do” something. That’s bullshit. YOU and only you can determine what submission means to you, what you need and what you want out of a scene. If you want to give up all other choice, hand things over to a Dom (and you can trust them!), then that is still consent, it’s still a choice. But don’t let anyone define your submission for you. Only you know what it should be.

This is the last day to leave a comment for the hop and a chance to win one of my Golden Collar books. The original information for the giveaway is here. If you’ve already got them all, we’ll work something out. ;)  I do hope you’ve enjoyed the posts and information and I do hope you will make sure to read the rest of the stuff out on the hop. Head over to the hop page for links to the rest of the posts and enjoy the sexy snippet ahead! Thanks for reading!

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From my second Golden Collar novel, Deception:

Bathasar pulled back once more, gray eyes focused on Nadir’s face. “So close, my sweet Nadir, I can see it. Just a little farther… yes….” Nadir made a sound halfway between a plea and a whimper, his body so on edge. Trained as the slaves were, he couldn’t go over the edge without being commanded to. And something told him he wouldn’t be given the command—not here, at least, in the public hall.

But he couldn’t stop himself from uttering the whines that sounded damned near like begging. Teman switched tactics, mouth moving to his balls. His friend took one in, sucking on it, and Nadir got even closer to the precipice. Teman moved to the other, giving it the same, then back to his cock. Then, a moment later, when Teman sucked on the tip of his cock again at the same time Cyrus tweaked both of his nipples, he hit the wall that was the lock on his orgasm. He let a cry out he couldn’t stop, his back arching hard, hand fisting around silk in a death grip.

And then it stopped. The mouths were gone, the stimulation vanished. He shuddered almost violently, the arousal still razor-sharp, his cock red, hard, and swollen, filling the snake to near overflowing.

“So beautiful. You’ve pleased me very well, my sweet Nadir,” Bathasar crooned in his ear. Bathasar’s arms went around him and cradled him as Nadir worked to get a grip on his sanity. His entire body was a live nerve, every tiny touch making it worse. Bathasar continued to speak soft words of praise in his ear, and eventually, he started to calm down.

The arousal faded, but only so far as he wasn’t on the edge of orgasm anymore. As his breathing slowed, Bathasar leaned back and kissed him on the forehead. “You have done so beautifully. Now, I need you to sit up. It is time to eat,” he said, doing so himself. Bathasar helped Nadir move, and Nadir glanced down to see how red his cock really was. His balls were tight, still wanting to release, and as he moved, the light chains did as well, teasing his still over-sensitive skin.

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Remember, tell me what your thoughts on submission are, a question about it, etc. and you’ll have a chance to win Deception. Thanks for joining me for the hop and happy reading!

BDSM Blog Hop, Part 4: Tease Me Tuesday

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Today, for Tease Me Tuesday, I’d like to introduce a relatively mild activity from the BDSM spectrum. One of my favorite parts of serving my Sir is to have my pleasure–and, subsequently, orgasms–controlled. Sometimes, that is simply during sex or a scene, where I am held back from finishing. Other times it involves being denied me for much longer periods of time.

Now, initially, one might think, “Well, that’s not a big deal. I don’t get to have sex for….” However, there’s a bit more to “denial” in the context of a D/s relationship than not getting to have sex. When my Sir denies me, it is, what I like to call, active denial. First off, knowing full well, that one is not allowed orgasm, changes things a bit, psychologically. Whereas any other time, the submissive could pull up some porn (like the hot stuff between Jesse Jackman and his husband Dirk Caber) and have some fun. But instead, while they may be more than allowed (possibly even encouraged) to watch the porn, they’re not allowed to take it anywhere. Further still, the submissive may often be required to edge (i.e, get themselves to the edge of orgasm but not finish), sometimes very often, making it even worse.

But I enjoy it. Partially because I know it pleases him and partially because it’s simply a portion of that exchange of power that I’ve talked about before (and has been discussed in other blog posts on the hop. Be sure to read them!). I love giving that up, love not having to think, not having to worry about anything. I love that feeling of being taken care of and yet knowing that I am making my Sir happy and pleasing him all at the same time. And denial is an easy way to do this.

The Golden Collar series is packed with denial scenes. I had a really hard time deciding which one to pick to put with this post. Since “Tease Me Tuesday” is supposed to be a short tease, I decided to stick with the one below. Bathasar loves denying Teman, it turns him on a lot, and Teman, entirely aside from serving Bathasar, really enjoys the edging, the teasing and the arousal that becomes his constant companion from it.

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He leaned in and kissed Teman’s ear. “I have decided to play while we are on the trip. You will be denied climax for the majority of our journey to Duankou. I will allow you one orgasm along the way. You will choose when, but it will just be one. However, I won’t make it easy on you, my love. Every night, I will tease you and work you. Then I will take you and fill you with my cum. And when it is over, I will leave your lovely cock unsatisfied. Each day, on our rest breaks, I will feed you myself and play with you until your cock is filling the cage completely and straining against it. And if I am feeling particularly wicked, I’ll even remove the cage now and again and have you stroke yourself for me.”

 

From Choicespart of the Golden Collar series, published by Dreamspinner press.

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What do you think of denial? Does it sound interesting? Fun? Would it be something you would be interested in? Remember to answer the questions and leave a comment for a chance at my books at the end of the hop! See the original giveaway info here. And follow the rest of the hop for more great posts on BDSM and the lifestyle!

BDSM Blog Hop, Pt 3: Music Monday

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Welcome back to the BDSM Blog Hop! Today, I thought I’d take my Music Monday and talk about BDSM in music. Many folks are familiar with Rihanna’s S&M. That one’s kind of obvious, I know, and one of the most prominent. I enjoy it; it’s a lot of fun. It’s also a little daring.

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What a lot of folks not in the lifestyle don’t know is that BDSM is, technically, illegal. Doesn’t matter that it’s between consenting adults. (I know, there’s BDSM in porn, there’s BDSM in music videos. I think there may be specific places it’s legal, but many are still not. I made the mistake of doing a cursory search, but the legality of BDSM is an extremely complex issue and SO out of the scope of this post.) So, much like how sex, drugs, alcohol and the like used to be referred to in a bit of code back in the 60′s (Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds, anyone?), BDSM is often hinted at, referred to in symbolic language, rather than addressed directly. Which, while annoying to a point, can also be cool.

There are two songs in particular that I listen to that have, to me, BDSM undertones. I know, there are, very likely, very different meanings that Sully Erna had when he wrote them. But like anything else written, different people have different interpretations. This is especially one of those times. The first I’d like to discuss is Voodoo.

Full lyrics here.

Anyone who is even remotely familiar with the song, knows the chorus:

I’m not the one who’s so far away
When I feel the snake bite enter my veins
Never did I wanna be here again
And I don’t remember why I came

For those of us in the Scene, the connection between the above and BDSM is not much of a stretch. I’ve made no secret of the fact that I am a submissive. I have, for a number of  years now, understood that I have an ingrained need to please. What comes along with that (at least for me) is that I then also hate disappointing people. A long, long time ago in a galaxy far, far away… wait, not that long ago ( ;) ), I learned to channel my need to please into my and  my Sir’s D/s relationship. I still feel that disappointment, though it doesn’t cause quite the same problems with other it once did. However, that disappointment really bothers me if I get it from my Sir. I Do. Not. Like. disappointing him. And if I do, it feels very much like the lyrics above. The idea behind it–what take away from that, is that the disappointment that Sir feels–and my subsequent reaction–is a lot like the figurative snake bite. I do not want to disappoint him. And often times, when I do displease him (rare, but it happens), I find myself wondering why the hell I did.  I’ve heard it described that a submissive–someone with the ingrained need to please like I do–would as soon hang himself as disappoint his Dom. I’ve felt that, and I can tell you, from my perspective, that’s 100% true.

The other song I wanted to talk about is also from Godsmack – Serenity.

Full lyrics here.

While the lyrics that hit me most from “Voodoo” are the chorus, there’s more to “Serenity” that applies, again to me. “Serenity” describes how I feel when when I go into subspace. I am quite sure that part of it has to do with the fact that the first time I went into subspace, “Serenity” was playing in the background.

For the readers who are not familiar with the term, I suppose I should attempt to define “subspace.” I say “attempt” because, in truth, subspace–like BDSM in general–is different for probably every person. I say “probably” because there are similarities. When I go into subspace, I tend to lose my… connection, as it were, to what’s going on around me. I am still aware–some people are not, but I am–but it’s in a more fuzzy, surreal way. I can see and hear, but it doesn’t touch me. I am in this place where nothing truly affects me the same. I can still feel what’s being done to me–this is often where pain become the utmost pleasure for me–but it doesn’t feel the same.

And, thus, “Serenity” describes this to me.

In a place where I can hide…Nothing changes, days go by

When I am in subspace, I couldn’t tell you if five minutes or five days has passed. I am gone. In Choices, I describe it as floating “…just off the surface of  nowhere.” And that is what it feels like. I am disconnected from most things, couldn’t tell you much beyond the vaguest awareness of what’s going on.

Where do we go when we just don’t know
And how do we relight the flame when it’s cold
Why do we dream when our thoughts mean nothing
And when will we learn to control

These lyrics here make me think of losing my connection to the real world, going into subspace, where coherent thinking has gone.

As we all know, music, stories, anything written, is open to intrepretation. I am sure there are many people out there that would look at these songs–even people within the lifestyle, perhaps–and tell me I’m batshit for my interpretation. But I wanted to share my perspective, how they make me feel. And, at least at my local kink club, these two are almost always on the playlist. There are a bunch of playlists out there with music played for scenes. I hope you enjoyed the glimpses into these two and what they do for me.

Have you heard any songs that make you think of BDSM? For those in the lifestyle, are there any that have particular meaning for you?

All comments get entered for a chance at my books. :)

“Voodoo” is from the Self-titled album Godsmack by Republic/Universal Records. Copyright ©1999 by Sully Erna & Robbie Merrill

“Serenity” is from the album Faceless also by Republic/Universal Records. Copyright ©2003 by Sully Erna and Tony Rombola

BDSM Blog Hop, Pt 2: Sexy Snipppet Sunday & being new to D/s

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I’d like to give a bit of an introduction here, in how this snippet I’m sharing is related to the Blog Hop.

As I’ve mentioned a few times here and there, there is an entire range of BDSM out there. There’s the seriously hardcore stuff, involving Masters and slaves (which I’ve even written about), things that lean more toward RACK (risk-aware consensual kink) than SSC (Safe, sane and consensual). And then there’s the other side of the equation. Stuff that some of my friends refer to as D/s Lite. I’ve done that, my Sir and I, when we first started to get into kink, kept things very light. Minor denial, a bit of control in bed, things like that. It led to a lot more, eventually turning into our much fuller D/s relationship that we have now.

But often times, I think, D/s starts like the passage below. Here, we see the lovely boys from my WIP, What About Now. Braden and Rafe start out as friends who become boyfriends and further partners. Rafe spent a lot of his life feeling very out of control of things and so, in compensation, ended up kind of being a bit of a control freak. In *some* places, that’s not a bad thing. He finds he really enjoys controlling and guiding things in the bedroom with Braden, giving Braden what he needs (though Braden doesn’t understand it entirely).

So, I wanted to show a lighter side of the D/s dynamic, what it is like before negotiations and protocol and rules and safewords. Hope you enjoy it! Do be sure to leave a comment with your thoughts on the scene at the bottom for a chance to win one of my books. :) (See the original BDSM blog post here for details.)

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Rafe had Braden’s hands pinned to the bed above his head by one hand, the other busy teasing Braden’s sac. Rafe, currently buried balls-deep in Braden’s ass, filled him but refused to move yet, a tease in itself. Rafe tugged then squeezed Braden’s balls and the slight pain went straight to Braden’s neglected dick, making it jump and leak. “Please,” Braden nearly begged.

“Mmm. Not yet,” Rafe murmured and the evil tone only made it worse.

Rafe’s fingers plucked at Braden’s nipples until they hardened, then teased skin before going back to his balls. Rafe touched everywhere it seemed, tormented everything except the one thing Braden wanted the most. His cock stood straight and hard, red, leaking, needy. And still Rafe ignored it.

Braden tried to move, to ride the cock buried in him, at least. But Rafe apparently anticipated it. As soon as Braden tried to pull off, Rafe lifted himself just enough to move with Braden, thereby denying Braden the friction he so desperately wanted.

A frustrated groan that morphed into a whine was the answer to this. “What do you want, Braden?”

Braden tried to form words, needed to answer, but Rafe’s thumb was once more teasing his already tight sac and coherency seemed to have completely abandoned him. “Please,” he managed, “Touch… touch me.”

“Hmm, here?” Rafe asked, brushing his fingertips along Braden’s inner thigh. When Braden gave an unhappy grunt, Rafe’s fingers moved to his balls again. “Or here?” They teased, then dipped down to Braden’s taint before moving back to his balls.

Braden thought he was going to cry from sheer frustration. He couldn’t remember being this aroused, like, ever. He couldn’t ever remember mindlessly needing to the point where he couldn’t speak. He tried to buck again, to ride Rafe’s cock but got the same lack of friction as before. “Please, baby, stroke my cock, fuck me, need so badly,” he finally spit out.

Rafe’s smile was wide… and altogether evil. Braden wasn’t sure if he was comforted by it or terrified.

Aroused won out over both and his already red cock turned nearly purple. Rafe shifted, pulled out so very slowly, then pushed back in, inch by agonizingly slow inch. Braden whimpered. He actually whimpered and Rafe gave a dark chuckle in response as he pulled out again at the exact same pace.

If Braden thought that was bad, when Rafe started stroking him, it got worse. He gave only tight, slow downward strokes, releasing at the base to start again at the tip. The were only enough to make it worse, push him closer to the edge of orgasm, but he knew they wouldn’t knock him over.

“Oh God, Rafe…” His sounds turned pathetic, nearly begging as Rafe continued the torture.

“What, baby?”

“Please—” He grunted when Rafe brushed his prostate but it, too, wasn’t enough, even with the strokes, even with the rest of the sensations.

“Please… what?”

“Fuck Me!” Braden nearly shouted. “Let me make you come!”

Rafe rewarded the words with a hard thrust, hitting Braden’s prostate again and a full up-and-down stroke. Braden moaned, thrilling as the pleasure shot through him. But it slowed again, Rafe going back to the maddenly slow thrusts and strokes.

Braden had a serious love-hate relationship with what Rafe was doing. He had a very difficult time telling Rafe what he wanted in bed and Rafe did this for him, Braden knew it, to help him get better at speaking his needs. But it had an unexpected effect: he found the denial aroused him as much—or more—as anything else. And so instead, he hovered on the edge of pleasure, need dragging each word from him almost brutally at the same time it simply made him want more of the same.

“Please, Rafe, fuck me hard and fast, take your pleasure, come for me,” he groaned.

Rafe’s lips surprised him with a hard kiss before he let go of Braden’s hands—though Braden kept them on his pillow—and shifted. A few seconds later, he was thrusting hard, moving fast as Braden had nearly begged him to do. “Fuck so good, baby,” Rafe murmured, eyes closing.

In the present, Braden moved the hand he had on his cock faster, the other cupping his balls, squeezing gently. Close, so close…

Braden kept his hands on his pillow but rolled his hips, fucking Rafe as much as Rafe was fucking him. His neglected cock bounced, teasing him but he ignored it, focused as he was on Rafe. He watched Rafe’s face carefully, thrilling as the pleasure started to claim him. Rafe reached out, wrapped a hand around Braden’s cock, and stroked it. Braden gritted his teeth, determined to see Rafe go first.

But when Rafe threw his head back, shouted Braden’s name and then… “come!” Braden lost it.

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Be sure to keep up with the rest of the blog hop! Head over here to see who else is participating. Leave a comment for a chance to win and don’t be afraid to ask questions. I’m always happy to answer anything I can.

BDSM Blog Hop, Part 1: Guest post by SirRubi

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To open my week on the BDSM Blog Hop, I’d like to offer up a guest post from my very own Sir. He’s agreed to answer some questions for us (and, though I know some of these answers, He still managed to surprise me!) and share His perspective of Domming and a few bits of the lifestyle, and how we participate in it.  I am doing a giveaway this week, to go along with the hop. I’ll be giving away two ebook copies of either of my Golden Collar stories, Choices or Deception and signed, decorated bookmarks from the Golden Collar world, as well. Be sure to follow the hop and leave comments and questions here, on my posts this week, for a chance to win. Any post with the BDSM Blog Hop badge contributes to the giveaway!

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How would you describe your “style” as a Dom?
I prefer firm but loving. It helps that my pet is also the love of my life :)

What’s your favorite thing about Domming?
I dislike chaos and the idea that I can’t control what goes on around me or, sometimes, to me. Being a Dom gives me a sense of order and control that I create myself.

What’s your mindset like?
When I’m going into a scene, I like to think of myself as a director, controlling all aspects of the scene (no pun intended). Lighting, position, temperature, how I affect my pet… One thing a director does though is let the performer play to their strengths. I like guiding the best out of my pet and letting her show me what she can handle.

How does effective communication play out in the D/s aspect of your relationship?
As we progress in our D/s relationship, we maintain very firm and open lines of communication. One thing I’ve learned from my marriage and a previous one is that it is a central pillar in a good relationship, no matter what nature of relationship it is. This works well during negotiations outside of our scenes and during our scenes, both when she lets me know where she is (through body language and audio cues, mostly) and when I show her what I want from her.

When did you realize you were interested in BDSM?
Not long after we got together, she who became pet and I played a lot in the bedroom. At one point, we tied each other up and teased each other and controlled the other’s distance to climax, for one thing. This gave us our first experiences together in denial and bondage. Time passed and pet suggested we play with that some more, with me in the leadership role. While it initially bothered me at first, because we are both completely equal in our relationship outside of D/s, I learned that she craved the opportunity to please me in a submissive sense and I had the desire to control something (and in this case someone) in my life. While we maintain our equal status outside of D/s, we have found much enjoyment and satisfaction in the exchange of power that comes in our D/s relationship.

What’s your favorite activity to do during a scene? Impact play? Denial? Or something else?
Impact play and denial, definitely, though I think I like denial better because we can play with that both in and out of scene. In fact, most of our pre-scene lead up is days or weeks of denial. This isn’t to say that I don’t like the crack of my crop on pet’s buttocks or the soft falls followed by harder thumps of my flogger…

Do you have a favorite toy?
Two, actually. My flogger and one of her vibrators. The latter has adjustable speed and intensity and allows me more control of… speed and intensity *evil grin*

Would you ever consider taking the D/s further, outside the bedroom? Have you and if so, what kind of limits?
I’ve considered it, but right now I feel like I have more to learn as a Dom. When I feel more comfortable with my presence, I think playing in a kink club (the local one is apparently quite private – read that as invitation-only, secret location, etc. – and frequented by good folk in the kink community), will be the next logical step. pet feels more comfortable in her role and feels that when the time comes, we’ll be amazing together, there. Limits? I think if I allowed another Dom to wield the flogger, sotospeak, my hard limit would be sexual contact. I covet my pet intensely, both in our D/s relationship and out.

Have you, as a Dom, ever safeworded? What might make you consider it?
Yes, I have, though it was only our “Slow, not stop” safeword (our’s are “burgandy” and “saffron”) when I saw her acting abnormally. This was early on when we were testing both our limits. It took her out of her headspace long enough for me to make SURE she was doing okay. she has only safeworded twice, once when she couldn’t get enough oxygen and once with a new toy with which neither of us had much experience, yet.

Knowing when to safeword is a learning experience. Most important of all is knowing both of your limits, hard and soft. Much of guesswork for when you safeword is eliminated by knowing where the lines lay. Then you only have to worry about physical issues like severe cramps, breaking skin, etc. and the unknowns, like mental or physical associations to certain toys or activities, that neither of you might realize you have.

Do you have any questions for Sir? What part of the lifestyle are you interested in (whether to read or participate)? Every question and comment counts for a chance to win. 

Sexy Snippet Sunday

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Final part of Patrick’s Surprise

Again, fair warning, it is most definitely 18+. *grin*

* * *

When he pulled back from the edge a bit, he started the video back up. This time, he knew he could make it. He wrapped his hand firmly around his cock, giving himself full, long strokes to delay those few more seconds. When Patrick groaned, “Fuck Chance” into his ear, he tightened his hand, dragged it over the tip then gave himself the short, fast strokes that would send him over the edge. He yanked his t-shirt out of the way and aimed his dick at his stomach.

And just as Patrick’s cock unloaded, spraying cum all over stomach and chest, Chance’s orgasm screamed through him. He couldn’t stop the quiet groan that escaped as his balls pumped stream after stream of cum out to coat his own stomach. The video froze on the picture of Patrick’s hand with more cum on it and he stared at it as he milked every last bit of pleasure out of his cock.

He panted hard, trying to gather enough wits to remember what he wanted to do. He hit the “back” on his phone, scrolled until he found the camera and hit the icon. When it came up, he rotated so it used the front-facing camera, aimed it at his wet dick where it lay right next to the cum on his stomach and snapped the picture.

He waited long enough to clean up and wash his hands, then he typed in: That’s what you caused. Fuck, baby, that was hot. I came *hard*. Then attached the picture and hit send.

 

Patrick climbed out of the shower, feeling fucking fantastic. Between the workout to get his muscles moving then the orgasm and shower, he felt like he could do just about anything.  He dried himself off, doing his best to be quick and efficient when it came to his cock because he did not want to get worked up all over again after all that.

He picked up the phone off the bedside table and grinned when he saw a message from Chance. He opened it… and his dick twitched hard. He stared, he couldn’t stop himself and before he realized what he was doing, he had his hand on his cock and had worked himself back to full erection.

He groaned, then chuckled and took a picture of it. He tapped the message box and typed, And that’s what *you* caused. Again. I am *so* fucking you hard after Avery’s in bed tonight.

 

Chance opened the message and laughed, but carefully avoided looking at the picture for too long. He sent his reply: I can’t wait, baby. My ass is all yours. Then he pocketed his phone and went back to work.

He had a very nice afternoon.

To be continued…

* * *

No Sacrifice is available now for pre-order from Dreamspinner Press.

 

Wednesday Briefs #27: Growth, Part 25

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Ghalib’s Welcome, Part 7

And now, Ghalib starts to think maybe he can handle this, after all…

“Now,” Nadir said, picking up a basket on the neighboring lounger and handing it to Teman. He pulled a piece of gold out and held it up. “Your collar. You will wear this at all times except during baths, which you will have often.” He placed the collar around Ghalib’s neck and Ghalib’s heart quickened when it was snapped closed. “Are you okay?” Nadir asked.

Ghalib nodded. “Yes, I… it’s… just… different.”

Teman smiled. “It is, at that. Is it uncomfortable?”

Ghalib considered the question then shook his head. “No, not at all.”

Nadir grinned then lifted a small gold lock and showed it to Ghalib. “This is as much symbolic as anything. If you need that off, we will take it off—that goes even for the other slaves,” he added when Ghalib opened his mouth. “We have seen a few truly react poorly to them. If you do, there are alternatives. Worry not, you will still wear a symbol of some kind of the slavery.”

Ghalib nodded.

“Good.” Nadir fitted the lock in place and clicked it shut. Ghalib pondered the feel, the slight weight and decided he liked it.

Teman held out two smaller pieces that were a similar shape to the collar. When Nadir put the first one around Ghalib’s wrist, he noticed it had soft edges and a velvet lining. “These do not lock. They are for both decoration and utility. If a master chooses to tie you down, they often use these to do so. They are much better for your skin than rope or plain leather is.”

“They didn’t use to be lined. Bathasar noticed at dinner one night that Bahi had sores on his wrists. When he asked Salehi about it, Salehi had told him it was a common occurrence when the masters tied the slaves tightly. Needless to say, Bathasar was not happy.”

Ghalib nodded. “I… can believe that of him.”

“The last piece you must wear will be the most difficult. Stand up, please.”

Ghalib had been expecting this. He couldn’t seem to look away as Nadir wrapped the thick hinged silver ring around his sac. It closed around both sac and cock, coming together on top of his cock at the base, forming a much smaller ring. Next Nadir lifted the cage—shaped like a flaccid penis, it was made of many thick, vertical bars that reached from the base and curved to a rounded point. Nadir spread thick oil on the inside then slid it over Ghalib’s cock. He threaded a lock through the smaller ring the cage slid over and clicked it closed.

Ghalib stared at it for a long moment. It felt heavy, pulling on his cock and balls and making him much more aware of them than he’d ever been before.

“Yes, it will be uncomfortable for a while. Eventually, you will get to where you don’t necessarily notice it. It takes about two weeks for your body to become accustomed to it. You will wake at night for a while as your body tries to force an erection. It will be uncomfortable, but it shouldn’t hurt. When your cock tries to fill, it will pull on the cage, thereby pulling on your balls.”

Ghalib looked up, eyes wide. He hadn’t considered that aspect of it. He’d known about the cages; he’d certainly removed them from Teman many times. “Two… weeks?”

Nadir nodded. “Yes. But like I said, it should not hurt. If it does, you must tell us, because it means we have probably put the wrong size cage on you. This might seem… opposite, but if the cage is too big, it gives your cock too much room. If it’s small enough, your body will learn its limits sooner.”

Ghalib nodded slowly. “That… actually makes a sort of sense.”

“Here, look at yourself,” Teman said in his ear, taking his hand. Teman tugged and Ghalib followed him to a mirror between two of the cabinets Ghalib hadn’t seen earlier. “You are beautiful,” Teman whispered.

Ghalib stared at himself. The gold of his collar and cuffs warmed his skin. His long black hair shone in the candlelight. He thought, somewhere in there, he might even see a hint of the grace he’d always admired in the other pleasure slaves. That’s when it hit.

He was now one of them.

And he knew, in that moment, he’d made the right decision.

* * *

You can visit the Wednesday Briefers home page HERE for opening snippets and links to all the briefs. Or you can go from this list:

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