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Today, for Tease Me Tuesday, I’d like to introduce a relatively mild activity from the BDSM spectrum. One of my favorite parts of serving my Sir is to have my pleasure–and, subsequently, orgasms–controlled. Sometimes, that is simply during sex or a scene, where I am held back from finishing. Other times it involves being denied me for much longer periods of time.

Now, initially, one might think, “Well, that’s not a big deal. I don’t get to have sex for….” However, there’s a bit more to “denial” in the context of a D/s relationship than not getting to have sex. When my Sir denies me, it is, what I like to call, active denial. First off, knowing full well, that one is not allowed orgasm, changes things a bit, psychologically. Whereas any other time, the submissive could pull up some porn (like the hot stuff between Jesse Jackman and his husband Dirk Caber) and have some fun. But instead, while they may be more than allowed (possibly even encouraged) to watch the porn, they’re not allowed to take it anywhere. Further still, the submissive may often be required to edge (i.e, get themselves to the edge of orgasm but not finish), sometimes very often, making it even worse.

But I enjoy it. Partially because I know it pleases him and partially because it’s simply a portion of that exchange of power that I’ve talked about before (and has been discussed in other blog posts on the hop. Be sure to read them!). I love giving that up, love not having to think, not having to worry about anything. I love that feeling of being taken care of and yet knowing that I am making my Sir happy and pleasing him all at the same time. And denial is an easy way to do this.

The Golden Collar series is packed with denial scenes. I had a really hard time deciding which one to pick to put with this post. Since “Tease Me Tuesday” is supposed to be a short tease, I decided to stick with the one below. Bathasar loves denying Teman, it turns him on a lot, and Teman, entirely aside from serving Bathasar, really enjoys the edging, the teasing and the arousal that becomes his constant companion from it.

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He leaned in and kissed Teman’s ear. “I have decided to play while we are on the trip. You will be denied climax for the majority of our journey to Duankou. I will allow you one orgasm along the way. You will choose when, but it will just be one. However, I won’t make it easy on you, my love. Every night, I will tease you and work you. Then I will take you and fill you with my cum. And when it is over, I will leave your lovely cock unsatisfied. Each day, on our rest breaks, I will feed you myself and play with you until your cock is filling the cage completely and straining against it. And if I am feeling particularly wicked, I’ll even remove the cage now and again and have you stroke yourself for me.”

 

From Choicespart of the Golden Collar series, published by Dreamspinner press.

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What do you think of denial? Does it sound interesting? Fun? Would it be something you would be interested in? Remember to answer the questions and leave a comment for a chance at my books at the end of the hop! See the original giveaway info here. And follow the rest of the hop for more great posts on BDSM and the lifestyle!

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